Online Infidelity


A red, white and black sign with the words Online Dating isolated on a white background, Dangers of Online Dating

Internet infidelity accounts for the growing number of relationship breakups. Partners engaged in online affairs go through several personality changes and often try to convince their partners an online affair is not really cheating. They believe it is harmless flirtation because it does not involve any physical touching. However the emotional pain and devastation to once a warm and loving relationship are just the same.

Finding out your partner has been cheating online is just as painful as finding out your partner is physically cheating. Can you imagine discovering your partner has changed their relationship status on Facebook, or never changed it when they did get into the committed relationship with you. It hurts big time and no one should be put through it from what is supposed to be a loving and respectful partner. Trust me I know.

I have been the subject of an internet adulterer and it hurt like hell! I discovered a former partner of mine who I thought was committed with me advertising himself as free and single online. He had a profile under a false name attached to several inbox messages full of obscene graphic content, the man I had opened my heart and home too made me feel worthless. When I discovered his unfaithfulness I also got to read through all the explicit emails and messages describing what he had, and wanted to do with them. I knew I could not stay in the relationship so I packed his bags and sent him packing.

What is Internet Infidelity?
Online infidelity goes by many names such as cyber affairs, cyber cheating, online affairs, internet affairs and internet infidelity. All of them mean the same thing-a romantic affair involving intimate or sexually explicit communication between two people, one of whom is either married or in a committed relationship, which is conducted over the internet.

Online affairs are top of the list when it comes to infidelity and extramarital affairs. The internet is now tied with the workplace as the leading place for cheaters of both sexes to find willing partners with whom to have an affair. A would be cheater no longer has to physically leave the home to seek out someone with whom to have an affair and risk running into family,friends, neighbours or inquisitive friends and workmates. The internet has removed the risk of being caught.

Are Online Affairs Cheating?
Some people say it’s not really cheating as there is no sex involved, but online affairs are actually a form of emotional infidelity. They may start out online but many progress to personal contact. Men and women also have different of opinions on online cheating, men don’t consider it an affair as women do. Emotional infidelity poses even more threats to a relationship because emotions are involved and they are just as serious.

Sexting and Cheating
Most people these days have a smart phone which can download apps for communication. Snapchat is a massive one which allows you to send photos and short videos. The app has a timer on it so that the person receiving it can only see the picture for 10 seconds. If that person is quick enough they could take a screenshot and use it elsewhere. There are also many other apps which allow for sexting such as viber, whatsapp and facebook. These apps not only make it easy for online affairs but it also makes it unsafe for children. Anyone exchanging messages privately involving explicit talk and photos is sexting.

How an Online Affair Affects Your Partner
The worst thing you can do is abuse your partner’s trust, you make them feel betrayed, hurt, jealous, angry and question their own existence in the relationship. Being neglected and ignored so the partner can go online and be emotionally connected to someone else is sole destroying.


If the adulterer is confronted by the innocent partner they are normally confronted with anger and defensiveness. The once loving and sensitive partner may become withdrawn well the other becomes quiet and tense. Ita not fair to submit someone to this behaviour.

Emotional-Infidelity: Signs of an Online Affair
There are just as many signs to watch out for with online affairs as their are physical affairs, that’s because they are both affairs. Here are a few signs.

  • A change in your partner’s sleep pattern as they tend to stay up later than normal to be able to speak to the online person via social media applications or email.
  • They demand more privacy when they begin an affair. When someone begins an affair, whether it be online or not they will go to great lengths to hide the truth. A bigger protection over their mobile devices and computer show signs of secrecy and signs you need to take note.
  • Their habits change at home and they may show less interest within their domestic surroundings. If they are doing less tasks and outings as a couple it can show a lesser commitment to the relationship.
  • Lying is a big sign that something is not right in the relationship. If your partner starts to hide or over explains himself, or trys to explain unknown sites on the credit card bill or bank statement you need to be concerned..
  • They may make personal changes, maybe their moods and behaviours have changed. If they become withdrawn and sensitive, quiet or serious since their uptake in using the internet you need to investigate. If your partner starts blaming you and becomes rational they could be trying to shift the blame onto you and will eventually refuse to communicate.
  • Loss of interest in sex is a obvious sign that something is not right between you. If they are having an online affair be aware that much sexting involves masturbation. When this happens they may seem less enthusiastic and responsive to lovemaking with you.

Tips for Preventing Online Infidelity
Maintain and open and honest relationship with your partner and put up boundaries to protect your relationship. Never send pictures of yourself over the internet as they can be used for anything, they can also affect your safety.
Recognise that long hours on the computer can lead to online conversations with strangers and many people are happy to have affairs, and yourself never start privately sexting someone if you are in a committed relationship, its betrayal.
If you feel you are missing out on intimacy at home start talking, do not look for it online. Also hold back from believing everything a poor soul may tell you online, it’s easy for them to lie just to get sex.
If you do start talking to old flames or acquaintances let them know you have a parter. If you value your relationship be open and honest about it.


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